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Social and Spiritual Fellowship => Miss Random Thoughts => Topic started by: tides2dust on Apr 25, 2018 07:07 am

Title: trying to understanding:relationships with those we're attracted to
Post by: tides2dust on Apr 25, 2018 07:07 am
well, this is kind of random
it's not meant to be overly egoic but i can be naive lol... on the run today i noticed something... girls i've had any physical intimacy with tend to come back randomly when i don't try to make anything out of it. this probably doesn't apply to my ex and this is kind of a new theory... but... if i have something with a girl and she leaves me to pursue another relationship, i have better luck letting her be and letting her come back on her own accord. not that they always do yet this has happened recently and it's not the first.. seems anytime i've tried to remain friends well it only drives us further apart or completely kills the intimacy. then it hit me, some of these women must still consider me an emotional/viable option for them to shut me out then come back. i think this is good even though it used to drive me crazy(i mean i think it still does to an extent)trying to figure it out. in reality, i can't be just friends with a girl i'm attracted to- it causes so much unnecessary suffering- it's usually my fault for trying to keep some kind of connection going. it's strange but pleasant to realize i prefer this instead of being riddled with worry in various aspects. i think when i try to clamp down like the crabby cancer i am i am making it about me, and how selfish... then some pretty negative emotions come up and well, lets just say any future chances to share can be ruined. from a spiritual sense the joy is in letting us both grow-so i come to this conclusion to let go- still holding love for them but letting them be...it's a work in progress but what do you know when i've just about forgotten someone that very random phone call comes

i hear my dad saying, "Duh Son."
im just finding out so late that it's best not to write to a girl after you've had a relationship with them- that if you stay out of their lives or if they've pushed you out of theirs it's because you might still be an option(not guaranteed) but it's best to let them go- opportunity for you both to explore and grow
let them do what they want and if any want to come back and share GREAT! i know i'm in because i guess this is what it means to be a lover... and how complicated yet beautiful...
if they decide to leave again no sweat, love is not so confined to one person and there's plenty to appreciate in our surroundings...

IDK what do you think? this is the one place i am comfortable writing and discussing... time to be slow and try to figure out these thoughts...

peace ~~ from miss random thoughts and mister not-so random rants.

Title: Re: trying to understanding:relationships with those we're attracted to
Post by: Steve Hydonus on Apr 25, 2018 11:23 am
Not so sure eric but really enjoy your observations! I do agree about the clammy behavior of a cancer and think it is a sore spot for us. I think we are going thru this lesson of life to let it go like a film script and not hold on to any of the individual pictures. And yea; there is plenty to appreciate. We just have to be receptive to the moments opportunities instead of dwelling on past glories or future possibilities.