Spiritual Portal

What a nice chat I had with Eric today! We were chatting a bit about Initiation and what it is, so I decided to quote how It has been described in the book initiation by Elizabeth Haich; 

Father of my soul I say as I arise, I want initiation. Ptahhotep asks, do you know what initiation is? What  does it mean to you when you say you want to be initiated? I don’t know exactly what it consists of, but I want to be omniscient. I feel like a prisoner in my body, as if I were feeling my way around in darkness, completely at the mercy of invisible forces I do not know and therefore cannot control.  I want to be able to see everything clearly, I want to be all-knowing like you and father and the other initiates.

Ptahhotep answers, Initiation means becoming conscious, you are now conscious to a degree corresponding to the resistance of your nerves and body. When a person becomes conscious to higher spiritual degree, he automatically guides higher stronger and more penetrating powers into his body. For this reason he must also raise the level of resistance of the nerves to the supreme degree in order to be able to endure this divine condition without harm to the body-that’s what initiation means. Initiation also entails omnipotence and omniscience.

I used to remember my mother telling me when I was a boy that her nerves were shot. I could never quite understand but after reading the above caption it makes more sense. I think Ptahhotep was talking about being overwhelmed.