these past couple of days i've been feeling pretty clear, maybe the full moon has something to do with it. not a cloud in the sky- last night i went out and gave thanks to the moon.
well a little while ago a friend and i had a falling out, for whatever reason
we were holding a grudge against each other
it feels good letting go
he saw the worst in me, and i in him
funny how we
mirror each other...
maybe it didn't happen at the same time, but we wouldn't be where we are now had this not been the circumstance
the only reason i saw the worst in him is because i saw the worst in me... if i can't love myself how am i to love another? i'm sure he was going through something as well,
funny ...?but you know what, i'm glad it happened. deep down, i know he's a good person. it's why we're friends. all this hate, its not who he is... not who i am
so, no more hatred. just like that. i feel in being true to myself i can prove any ill-mannered projections or predeterminations directed towards me in attempts to define who i am, wrong
in peace
i'm not upset that we had a falling out, in fact i am a bit relieved. will we hang out again? probably
it's definitely not over yet, there's still much to do
i'm grateful though, to see this. to see how we mirrored one another... to realize, everything has purpose. every person in your life has something to offer- and wherever you are now, whoever is around you- well, consider your equal- on some level or another, maybe the person next to you is experiencing something similar- whatever that may be.
like... being happy or being angry.
i'm also grateful i work for a 3 and a half year old
i know the little one has been upset with me before... but our bond is stronger then ever. he is quick to forgive but definitely shows me when he's displeased in my actions. i want to be able to do the same with the situation here between my friend and i... it's what friends do... i'd rather my friend see the worst in me than a stranger
all and all it was a humiliating yet rewarding experience
hmm
