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Steve Hydonus
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« on: May 09, 2012 08:02 pm »

When you meet people do not become affected by their state of consciousness.
Be one with those who are ever singing of God; remain aloof from those who
reveal undesirable qualities.....to evolve to a saintly state while clinging to
evil companions would be most difficult. It is most important to know
that sinners or saints are largely made through the company they keep. P.Y.
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« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2012 08:30 pm »

Sometimes we meet people who show a spiritual interest yet they have some very difficult problems with relationships. They seem to go from one difficult situation to another or they manifest problematic interpersonal skills and seek temporary 'fixes'. We can love these people from a distance otherwise they pull us into their problems.

If we find ourselves emotionally involved with others who are unable or unwilling to give and take in a relationship we need to withdraw and cultivate relationships that work both ways. We can drain our psychic energies otherwise. This is a conclusion i have come to in having close relations with others. i say this because at this point in spiritual direction i have found that time is too short to give energy to relationships that have little or no spiritual basis. i would b interested to know if any of u can relate to what i am saying or can comment.

We often get a glimpse of other peoples character thru those they choose to spend their time with. As much as we may love someone we need to see just what they want out of life from who they choose to associate with. i believe that as spiritual beings we should not continually blame our environment and others for the conditions we find ourselves in. Sometimes those close to us want us to fit into their lives independently of the lifestyles they have chosen for themselves. It is evident that we ourselves create our environment thru our thoughts and choices. We are not victims. We actually create separations or togetherness with others thru the choices we have made in the relationships we make and continue to cultivate with those in our every day life.

Most people have very little comprehension of the fact that even the area we live in, the family we have and the people that come into our lives are a result of prenatal decisions desires and attachments. The post natal choices we make determine future outcomes circumstances and environments. We often forfeit tremendous opportunities for spiritual evolution and advancement because of habits that determine decisions in the present. These are spiritual realizations that have come to me over my life and looking at the choices and results that my friends and i
have made and the grace that has helped me in this important spiritual
lesson.

Jitendra

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« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2012 03:43 pm »

Our commitment to the spiritual life is easily assessed by the company we keep. We cannot make people be what they do not want to be. We have to work with them and accept them at the level that they are at. This sometimes can be painful from our end of it. Yet if we abandon our efforts with others we also abandon our spiritual development. We must recognize that our path and theres may not always intertwine still we are grateful to have spiritual friends and support them in their efforts.
 
Jitendra
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« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2012 03:44 am »

hiii
i'd like to exercise healthy relationships and live a balanced life with those i am emotionally involved with.
it is challenging at times
when i am eager i am too dependent. this pulls away from the ability to experience and share bliss in the moment. sometimes i let fear and doubt anchor me. the challenge now is to dissolve and to learn, how to. not say goodbye and let the other live their life freely- and live mine freely-without worry of our standing or constantly seeking the others comfort or delving to much into a persons psych, being judgmental and creating barriers, or making rules that close me off from those spiritual opportunities to grow. hmm im not sure how much sense i make  Grin but i know the things i want to practice. must practice, am taking steps in
and just learning how to be happy for what we share, when we share- and not sweat the times we aren't
because we can experience bliss with or without those we are emotionally involved with. in a healthy relationship, they just add to it
and althought i barely scrape the surface in understanding what you speak of, i am grateful for this thread. and another discussing the deep impressions we share with others.
the heart heheheh has much to understand

i seek harmony and hope to make things work ! but KNOW i must learn patience in order to will these things, and learn to go with the flow.
its interesting to discuss but . . . not much to discuss ! Cheesy heheh instead i let go ! but yes. good things here *nod* just wanting to share recent endeavors. give thanks for this thread. and find it interesting how some things you share here spark my interest in this moment in time

freedom !  Grin thats what i really want
happiness
but do wish to continue to share love and friendship and kindness

dont stop
patience patience
dont stop
wildflowers in my hair
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« Reply #4 on: May 20, 2012 12:09 pm »

good ideas real good ideas eric sometimes we can be satisfied just knowing we tried. it's easy to be hard easy to be cold. but look what happens when we try to  be kind. you get all these good friends together spiritually evolving helping each other. nobody should be so egotistical so prideful that they can't deal with failure. failure is only a concept a state of being. to someone else it represents a need to find a new approach. often we regain our perspective about the actions of others or the inaction of others. we know that sometimes we could be better than that. it is not within us to hurt others like that. we would show more kindness. and that is why we have friends like you like us.... OM

Jitendra
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« Reply #5 on: Jul 29, 2012 07:05 pm »

In relationships Love happens when two souls touch and to have love last both souls keep that connection alive.

Jitendra
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« Reply #6 on: May 16, 2014 05:23 pm »

There is often an ambiguity about relationships. You like to be around people you feel attracted to. Yet the attraction can easily lead to the falling out of the relationship. There is always the other side of the coin to attraction and that is repulsion.

Those you may feel less attracted to may be wonderful friends but there is not the same magnetic pull. Although the staying power usually is longer. Having the attractive energy of true love and spirituality is the attractive power we are trying to develop. The repulsion to this is strong in tamasic personalities.
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« Reply #7 on: Nov 16, 2014 02:37 am »

Ah....speaking of relationships. Some people, when they think of relationships, cannot get beyond conjugal relationships. Nor past the physical aspects. So we must have the ability to think of relationships beyond many people's mentally conditioned framework. 

The chemistry between people has a very cold,  warm or hot nature. It is an energy that needs care in using. Some people are like firebugs they lite us up and then leave us smoldering or create a forest fire. Remember what Yogi bear said; play with matches and you could create a forest fire. But other people are like duds; as soon as they are lighted they fizzle out. But there are the ones that leave a warm fire at nite and continously feed it with branches here and there that make life memorable.

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« Reply #8 on: May 27, 2015 06:43 am »

I do not always have definitive answers to life's brushes with encounters. I try to move in a direction that seems rite for all involved and that will be to our highest benefit. While recognizing we are still working out our desires on this plain of existance; we must also keep in mind our spirits longings and fulfillment in our relationships.
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« Reply #9 on: Aug 16, 2015 02:00 pm »

i believe that it is better to go unmarried rather then force compatibilities that are not there. Perhaps this is becoming more and more the life style of the future. Many people 'force' relationships by cutting others out of their lives and then fortify themselves into relationships that really do not speak for their individual spiritual and social values. Nor do they support them. All in the name of a worn out custom that really is not necessary; marriage. At least not necessary until it flows comfortably with out interfering with lifestyle and spiritual seeking.

In the case where someone does have a marriage that no longer fits them... a creative approach must be found to their relationship otherwise they find themselves in a self made prison. It is often better for people to be able to explore the vast potential of relationships and friendships. Through these encounters; there is a wonder that expands our perspective on life rather than a suffocation in narrow confining relationship that do not reflect our growing awareness and expanding consciousness. This includes relationships that may not be marriage but confine us with conditions.
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« Reply #10 on: Aug 16, 2015 07:36 pm »

i believe that it is better to go unmarried rather then force compatibilities that are not there. Perhaps this is becoming more and more the life style of the future. Many people 'force' relationships by cutting others out of their lives and then fortify themselves into relationships that really do not speak for their individual spiritual and social values. Nor do they support them. All in the name of a worn out custom that really is not necessary; marriage. At least not necessary until it flows comfortably with out interfering with lifestyle and spiritual seeking.

In the case where someone does have a marriage that no longer fits them... a creative approach must be found to their relationship otherwise they find themselves in a self made prison. It is often better for people to be able to explore the vast potential of relationships and friendships. Through these encounters; there is a wonder that expands our perspective on life rather than a suffocation in narrow confining relationship that do not reflect our growing awareness and expanding consciousness. This includes relationships that may not be marriage but confine us with conditions.
__________________

Everything is energy. People carry an energy. If they do not carry an energy that is conscious of spirit then their vibration is animal in nature. If there is no acknowledgement of spirituality then their vibration is dark and leads us towards maya.

We may be attracted to various dark energies as a result of desire, envy, greed or passion nevertheless the energy leads us away from divine magnetism and understanding and on a spiral downward. Magnetism, like most other energy sources is subject to duality and has a dark side as well. People we meet and situations we are exposed to are a result of past karma. However we do have the free choice to discern the nature of our relationships and where we want to invest our energy.
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« Reply #11 on: Aug 19, 2015 04:54 am »

i believe that it is better to go unmarried rather then force compatibilities that are not there.

One is not better than the other, they're both different, in that you can learn something either way.

Funny I was just talking to a co-worker about 60's/70's music vs 90's and up. He said to me what I just said, they're different, one is not better than the other. But in this case I completely disagreed.  Grin
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« Reply #12 on: Aug 21, 2015 12:48 pm »

hiii
i'd like to exercise healthy relationships and live a balanced life with those i am emotionally involved with.
it is challenging at times
when i am eager i am too dependent. this pulls away from the ability to experience and share bliss in the moment. sometimes i let fear and doubt anchor me. the challenge now is to dissolve and to learn, how to. not say goodbye and let the other live their life freely- and live mine freely-without worry of our standing or constantly seeking the others comfort or delving to much into a persons psych, being judgmental and creating barriers, or making rules that close me off from those spiritual opportunities to grow. hmm im not sure how much sense i make  Grin but i know the things i want to practice. must practice, am taking steps in
and just learning how to be happy for what we share, when we share- and not sweat the times we aren't
because we can experience bliss with or without those we are emotionally involved with. in a healthy relationship, they just add to it
and althought i barely scrape the surface in understanding what you speak of, i am grateful for this thread. and another discussing the deep impressions we share with others.
the heart heheheh has much to understand

i seek harmony and hope to make things work ! but KNOW i must learn patience in order to will these things, and learn to go with the flow.
its interesting to discuss but . . . not much to discuss ! Cheesy heheh instead i let go ! but yes. good things here *nod* just wanting to share recent endeavors. give thanks for this thread. and find it interesting how some things you share here spark my interest in this moment in time

freedom !  Grin thats what i really want
happiness
but do wish to continue to share love and friendship and kindness

dont stop
patience patience
dont stop
wildflowers in my hair

Eric in this post you mentioned being " judgmental and creating barriers, or making rules that close (us) off from those spiritual opportunities to grow." i believe this is a helpful observation. One of the downfalls of relationships of all sorts is giving ultimatums or setting up rules for relationships. We seldom know what without doubt is right for a relationship. We may have a stronger view of what is right for us but rarely do we know what is right for a relationship since a relationship is dynamic and is a process rather then an end in itself; defined and set in stone. i also think you have a good point about being too eager and how it makes you dependent. Being to eager is quite like chasing a butterfly. If if you catch it there is no enjoyment for the butterfly and so you too find no joy in its captivity. But you may be peaceful and in the moment and suddenly it lands right on you with all its beauty splendor and wonder.
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« Reply #13 on: Aug 23, 2015 04:14 pm »

There is the energy of one person and then the energy of another person. But when the two energies are together you can't control it. It is something you witness with wonder.
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« Reply #14 on: Jan 27, 2016 07:51 pm »

You know, words are so powerful - more than most of us realize, I suspect.  They resonate and last - sometimes for years.  Some people let the words fly based on a passing emotion, especially when angry.  Later, when they realize how the power of those words may have impacted the other person, they might apologize sincerely... but the sting is still there.  It lasts.  Do that enough times, and the other person might believe in the power of the sting more than the power of the apology and stop responding.  The origin of the anger and the resentment depends on the rapport of the people.  Could be a clash of personalities.  Could be projections from childhood!  Could be someone is overly sensitive.  Could be someone is not sensitive enough. This is why it's better to assume innocence.  Might have nothing to do with you.  Might have everything to do with you.  Just because we believe we are spiritual doesn't mean we never behave like jerks!  Lol. 

On the other topic, I find that on the web, when one invites a stranger to correspond privately they sometimes feel at liberty to say completely inappropriate things - especially men.  Declarations of romantic love!  Unasked for advice based on not much! Temper tantrums, etc.   For some - not all - there is a sense of instant intimacy that is mostly imagined.   I don't like that.  Getting to know people takes time.  Not saying you personally would do such things, but it's sort of a habit I've developed. I prefer to get to know people out in the open first. I suspect I lived in Victorian times once - lol! Am kind of old fashioned. Smiley

The owl is beautiful - like you said, the eyes are very human-like.  Sensitive.  There is something lonely about it.  No, not lonely, raw.  Do you know who painted it?  The colors are washed out.  The focus is the eyes.  I think you nailed it in your description.  I see the same things.  Smiley

Personally i have never seen myself in the lite u r portraying. So it is bit hard for me to relate. i had to think about it for a while... to b honest with myself. However, like u and others here on the forum; i have had to know how to behave as people leave my life and i leave their life. Which is quite a different matter from getting to know someone.

Declarations of love have always been mutual and a sense of intimacy arose over time. Or acceptance of different feelings for one another emerged and were recognized. So any words that were said came much later after i had known someone for sometime. That in some ways is much more difficult then finding out some one is fresh from the beginning. Because it often takes time to know and develop a recognition of peoples expectations of you and your needs from them.... finally u become aware of what other people---that are close--- have wanted from you for sometime but you may not have recognized it.... Or what u may want out of someone else and u may not b able to get.

Words can increasingly b painful when we find we cannot fulfill someone elses' desires or spiritual needs. Words can also b increasingly difficult when we find out that other people cannot fulfill our desires and spiritual needs. Meeting someone in private and finding out what they want is much better in some ways. To give and example: i remember women who i spent time with who at one point early along came rite out and told me that they wanted romance with me. If they hadn't been outspoken i would have led them on the whole time---not intentionally though--It was because we spent private time together that feelings were exposed .... private feelings towards me.  Also on the flip side if i had never spent private time with others i would not express what i was feeling and known where we stood in our relationship. So in this sense i would say i am much different then u. Which is O.K.  Smiley  i am not sure that being 'Victorian' -- as u put it-- has anything to do with developing relationships for me. It is something i haven't encountered in someone else--- that's all. Smiley Have i been around 'swingers' all my life? i don't think so. LOL  Grin

It is at these times... later on in a relationship that the choice of words and our attitudes in dissolving relationships play a key role in the aftermath of parting. It is very awkward knowing something that at one time was very spontaneous and inspiring has become discouraging, and now lacks luster and enthusiasm. But most relationships have a time span and what actually lasts thru our life and many incarnations is something to really b treasured. Most relationships are unable to withstand the test of time. That has been my experience. There r those that r with us for the long haul! i would say-- for the most part-- they recognize our true purpose together: That is to help one another and serve each other as we return homeward.

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