We think we do this or that. That is our maya. We attribute all good and bad qualities to an entity which we think we are. I think I am sitting here posting something. That is maya. Or "I" may think I am not posting, that God is posting this. Still, the "I" remains thinking this or that. Who is this entity who is meditating, who is this entity who is witnessing, who is this entity that is stepping back from it all? Who is posting this? Who is talking to whom on tihs forum? That is the maya. It is our awareness as an ego, not our belief or opinion about it. I can sit here and say all this and still not have freed my awareness from the consciousness of a small self. In fact, that is what is happening.
You see, I have a certain philosophical understanding of adwaita. Still, as "I" sit here, it has not become my own realization. Only through imperfect glimpses am I saying all of this stuff. That's why I say I am a hypocrite and that it is an inevitable stage on the path to knowledge. Now the question arises, how do I know that I have had imperfect glimpses of this? The answer is, I don't.
i understand your feelings here about being hypocritical because we are somewhat getting glimpses and not seeing the whole picture. In that sense i see serving as flowing when i start feeling glimpses of joy in serving...then it becomes more effortless. This does occur as we meditate more often and the expression of the results of meditation flow into our lives.