Companionship with Evolutionary Compatibility

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

Thank you Steve - I appreciate your reaching out and taking the time to respond - putting your thoughts on 'paper'.  Much food for thought there.  This is a very difficult time for me, and so it is not easy or even possible at times to form ideas into coherent words. I have attempted to reply a few times but everything that comes out feels forced and contrite.  That said, I didn't want another day to go by without at least a 'thank you'.  So, thank you!  I am spending a lot of time these days just being - doing simple things that make me happy, and trying to get a handle on my emotions. I read a lot, and paint - meditate - take care of the children.  Bought myself a bodhran a couple of weeks ago; something I've wanted for many years, and so when I feel I am about to burst I practice rhythms.  Ha ha.  life's a trip.  :-)

c'est la vie!  <3

c'est la vie! comme ci comme ça! Dance with me, say ooo yah yah! U have very fortunate children!

Interesting. i had a dream which you were a part of last nite about the time you wrote this entry. Telepathy?

Around here i drive a semi truck during the week and perform music on weekends. It's been a trail of artists, photographers, musicians and meditators coming over to visit or occasionally i visit them on the weekends. Two of them dropped by from the Oregan and out west area this week end. Outwardly, life seems much different then in California. But really it is still about serving God, meditation and learning in this big school we r in.

Oh; that Bodhran is claimed to have celtic roots.... a culture i have seemed to attract close relations with. It seems that when i pick up the mandolin that connection arises rather spontaneously to the  British Isles. Someday i hope to hear you play the Bodhran with some of the mandolin songs that showed me such things from a distant past.

i do not expect anyone to make sense. No sense makes sense. Rite? That's nonsense. Actually; at a deeper level it is beyond sense. Quite often when i find coherent words it bores people or scares them off. Life IS a trip! A double ha ha back!

sentiments chaleureux

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

Thank you Steve - I appreciate your reaching out and taking the time to respond - putting your thoughts on 'paper'.  Much food for thought there.  This is a very difficult time for me, and so it is not easy or even possible at times to form ideas into coherent words. I have attempted to reply a few times but everything that comes out feels forced and contrite.  That said, I didn't want another day to go by without at least a 'thank you'.  So, thank you!  I am spending a lot of time these days just being - doing simple things that make me happy, and trying to get a handle on my emotions. I read a lot, and paint - meditate - take care of the children.  Bought myself a bodhran a couple of weeks ago; something I've wanted for many years, and so when I feel I am about to burst I practice rhythms.  Ha ha.  life's a trip.  :-)

McCoy, yes the children are with me.  They are certainly impacted, but we will do our best.  Our home is peaceful.  I am considering adding a dog to our little family in the summertime. The holidays are trying with all the nostalgia, but I will go to my family on the West coast soon for a love filled visit. My husband is still in the picture and is very sorrowful about how he chose to make his exit, etc and we will always be friends - I know this in my core - but at the moment, I prefer to avoid his presence because my main emotion despite all is that of profound betrayal.  Listening to his apologies and professions of how this is the best for all of us (so that we can grow) should be some consolation, but if I am homest, deep down, I am still raging - and it impacts my health.  c'est la vie!  <3

It is challenging----Making peace with our past. The impact of relationships is so intense that it makes profound changes and awareness realizations for years to come and perhaps even a lifetime. To me the only long time cure and relief is time itself and new people who come in our life that we find affinity with in our life long search for meaning, purpose and learning. As long as we r caught up in the things that others have done to us---we still r in karmic residue. When we finally start to let go of our astonishment of what happened and how others acted we begin to let go of the karma we share with those people. Otherwise the emotional bond of turmoil continues.

We basically have to love ourselves. That means loving the past as well and realizing it was never quite like it seemed.. nor were the people in it quite like they seemed. But this is true of life itself. We live so much in our own minds and our own projections. We make people into what we think but not what they are. Of course it does not help to have others play up to such projections.

Reality is always much different then what we have thought. But this works both ways. People can turn out much more valuable to us also and others just do not stand the test of time.

[mccoy]

A little OT but, Steve, sooner or later you'll have to post a pic of the semitruck you drive, they are fascinating vehicles indeed, especially the American models.
In the cockpit there must be vast room to meditate.

Something like this?

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

Shannon

I have started a welcome for u, a prayer thread and a astrology area. U  seem to gravitate to this section....so i will write accordingly. i believe we have more choices then we allow ourselves. Habit is such a strong conditioned reflex that we often close ourselves off to  the possibilities. That has been my personal experience. What once seemed natural and  part of my life now seems so distant and not applicable to my current life. At one level i would like to drag those people back into my life but they just don't fit my growing awareness. Perhaps this rings true with u as well. Sometimes the big actresses/actors in our life just seem to fade away.... the karma lingering on as we try to make sense of it all. Desire and karma are rather interesting in retrospect but going thru it is a whole different matter. Some of the 'lites' in our life have always been there. We may have not noticed their significance as more dazzling spectacles crowded the front stage.

I believe I am a long ways from the script of life being written out like I would like to have seen it. But day by day i also realize how ridiculous my desires have been to rule the world instead of experience the unfolding show. Our ego is caught up with being something while our spirit recognizes the moments of just being.



Steve

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

We live thru different incarnations in this body as well. They r defined by the relationships or the aloneness we have experienced at different times of our lives. Like past lives some of these people have faded from our present life as well.

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

Thank you Steve - I appreciate your reaching out and taking the time to respond - putting your thoughts on 'paper'.  Much food for thought there.  This is a very difficult time for me, and so it is not easy or even possible at times to form ideas into coherent words. I have attempted to reply a few times but everything that comes out feels forced and contrite.  That said, I didn't want another day to go by without at least a 'thank you'.  So, thank you!  I am spending a lot of time these days just being - doing simple things that make me happy, and trying to get a handle on my emotions. I read a lot, and paint - meditate - take care of the children.  Bought myself a bodhran a couple of weeks ago; something I've wanted for many years, and so when I feel I am about to burst I practice rhythms.  Ha ha.  life's a trip.  :-)

McCoy, yes the children are with me.  They are certainly impacted, but we will do our best.  Our home is peaceful.  I am considering adding a dog to our little family in the summertime. The holidays are trying with all the nostalgia, but I will go to my family on the West coast soon for a love filled visit. My husband is still in the picture and is very sorrowful about how he chose to make his exit, etc and we will always be friends - I know this in my core - but at the moment, I prefer to avoid his presence because my main emotion despite all is that of profound betrayal.  Listening to his apologies and professions of how this is the best for all of us (so that we can grow) should be some consolation, but if I am homest, deep down, I am still raging - and it impacts my health.  c'est la vie!  <3

I believe  what is most important  to us and to me in particular is that we are able to get to know you. This has been difficult in the past because you focused your life so singularly on your family. Don't you feel as though you are letting more people into your life now? We have been communicating on and off again for years and as u know we share many memories from our days at yoganandaji which i do not intend to stop unless for some reason it becomes necessary to take a break. By the way we appreciate your picture... so much Scorpio there. But that is another topic I intend to continue in another area.

[SpiritImage]

Everybody's different, take me for example.

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

Each soul is utterly unique, no?  I mention this because what might seem like misguided activity to one may not seem – or even be - misguided to another; it may actually be a necessary part of one’s spiritual evolution to experience what and who they do, and when – and within which circumstances.  It seems to me that friends are simply friends; you feel them, you celebrate them – you enjoy their company when they are there, and miss them when they are gone – but one does not weigh and measure the intent of a friend, or analyze their life – or have expectations, etc.  Sometimes old (soul) friends appear when we need a little support.  Sometimes they come when we need a push in the tush, and they look more like an enemy than a friend.  Sometimes no matter how great the desire, there is no friend to be felt.  All of this is as it is, and I trust there is a good reason behind it.  Time is also a very funny thing.  We use words like ‘current’ and ‘aspiring’ which both imply a sense of time and movement, but really…. we are who we are, and a friend is a friend is a friend.  Does this make any sense?  It isn’t what we do that connects us so much as who we are.

 

Shannon May i add this;

We are who we are. Yet what we were is not what we are. Our discovery on the path from life to life and even in this life makes us quite different in our approach to ourselves and others. Time acts like an act of attrition wearing away the sharp edges and creating a diamond over many lives. We are who we are but how many have really recognized who we really are? How many play out roles that are worn out and no longer serve any useful function? The role we are playing out today is quite different then the one we played out as teenagers and the costume and script we are rehearsing this life time is quite different then other lives we have lived.

Our motivations change. Our ideas change. Our friends change. Our partners change. All the result of an unfolding and awakening consciousness.

J.

[SpiritImage]

We are who we are. Yet what we were is not what we are.

I like that other theory too, we are what we are from a sum of past actions.

[Shannon]

Our consciousness and awareness evolve. Spirit is constant.  The roles we play change.  The perfection that is our soul is steadfast.  The rest is peeling onion skin.  When I use the word 'friend', I am referring to the Spirit in me seeing Spirit in others.  We are who We are.  One day, as the layers fold back, we shall be able to see all people as friends, and recognize that one thing which never changes.

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

Our consciousness and awareness evolve. Spirit is constant.  The roles we play change.  The perfection that is our soul is steadfast.  The rest is peeling onion skin.  When I use the word 'friend', I am referring to the Spirit in me seeing Spirit in others.  We are who We are.  One day, as the layers fold back, we shall be able to see all people as friends, and recognize that one thing which never changes.

Yes and old souls gather around one another. they get closer and closer to the center of the tornato. there is calm. everything else is thrown off in a centrifugul force. As we get closer to that calm in the center we are the force that holds others in our orbit so everything that is out there is part of the force we ourselves r part of. Nothing is more reliable then the friends close to the center because everything else can be thrown out from the center of orbit. It is our struggle to work against opposing forces that are taking us outward from the center of spiritual gravity.

[SpiritImage]

How do you guys come up with that stuff?

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

How do you guys come up with that stuff?

i believe she will laugh, smile and love again. Isn't that what it's all about ?

[SpiritImage]

If that's how it's accomplished, then of course. I'm out of the loop nevermind me.

[Jitendra Hy-do-u-no-us?]

If that's how it's accomplished, then of course. I'm out of the loop nevermind me.

i have never interpreted her responses  to me as anything more then friendly correspondence. If they r i am unaware of it. I would never consider u  'out of the loop' Your friendship and communications r valued by me.